Twisted Ovaries

1+1 = 2

So.

Yesterday I spoke to the clinic-twice. The first time I rang, twitchy and impatient in Upper Buttfuck, and since I hadn't heard from them I took matters into my own hands. They had only just started to thaw my embryos, so when I spoke to them two hours later, the world was a different place.

I had 5 embryos thawed-a "straw" (they call them straws, which always makes me think of Ovaltine for some reason) of three 4-cell embryos and a straw of two 5-cell embryos. We had debated only thawing the straw with three 4-cells, this was nearly our plan of action, but good thing we didn't-neither of the 5-cells survived the thaw anyway.

With the successfully thawed embryos, the race was on. Two of the 4-cells survived with all 4 cells. One survived with 2 of 4 cells. Our appointment was this morning at 10 am.

We woke this morning and I felt in the mood, so a little bedroom action was had. I realized afterwards this may not be a clever move-seeing as how sperm can survive in the body for a few days, the doctor would most likely have a view of some little swimmers come transplant time. I tried to rinse out as much as I could in the shower, I felt a bit embarassed, but then figured: What the hell. He's a reproductive doctor, anyway, he should be used to this.

We go in, both of us slightly chipper. I realize I feel positive and try to stop myself from feeling so-the sight of a negative pregnancy test a sight I know very well, and it's absolutely gut-wrenching. We talk to the nurse for a while, where we determine the ass bullets need to walk up a few paces and need to start going into Beaver Land, as the ass side of things is making me ill.

The RE comes in (with a trainee RE who is, wouldn't you know it, very pregnant.) Our doctor comes in as well (there are two doctors there, and this is the one who did my transfer last time). They announce cheerfully that all the embryos have kept dividing, but they will put the two 4 cells back in, which have now become 5 cells-one of the 5 cells is a grade 2, one is a borderline grade 1 or 2, and both of them are free from fragmentation.

I ready up in my Gucci cloth. They show the embryos on the screen, and as my doctor tells them to focus, etc, there is a throb of excitement. "Look!" shouts the RE. "One of them is dividing right now!" They finally focus on the embryos and the doctor shows us that one of them is dividing.

Ummmm....okay. It's absolutely unclear to Aidan and I what's going on, although it's true that one of them is moving somehow, and it looks full of rolling mercury balls.

"See it dividing?" asks the doctor.

It's true I see something's happening, but am not sure what. I really want to say yes, I want to say: Look at that cleavage! and not be talking about boobs, but I really don't understand what's taking place. He and the RE are experts though, so I'm going to assume a rolling mercurial mass doth a split make.

The doctor turns to us. "That was an excellent divide."

I wondered if he needed a cigarette then.

"It's done?" I ask. It looks no different to me, still just a mass of little balls.

"Oh yes. Things will be happening quite quickly now with the dividing," he replies. "It's unusual to see it divide like that on screen, just before transfer."

So I'm lucky then. I got to see proof that my embryos? Yeah, they like to boogie

We go over what to do and what not to do (not to do: have a bath, go for an aerobics class today, and no black tar heroin. To do: take it easy today, keep taking the meds, and sex, unexpectedly, can often help with implantation so I'll be trying to see if I can fire up Aidan. Again.)

I am now implanted with a 5 cell and a 6 cell embryo, and will have my test on August 16.

I still-perhaps foolishly-feel rather positive.

And if you'll excuse me now, I have some 80's DVDs to watch as I take it easy on the couch, and my lovely boy is going to make me macaroni and cheese for lunch.

Posted by Vanessa at August 2, 2006 11:31 AM | TrackBack